I'm the one in red

I think something’s wrong with my knee and dammit, this time it’s not my fault. It doesn't hurt when I run, but moving it side-to-side is a bitch. I didn't do anything to it, I swear. I’ve hurt myself on more than one occasion, so I can see how that might make sense, though.

Visiting Dallas, January 2008: I went down flat on my face like I suddenly lost all motor skills, and seriously injured myself in the parking lot of Cuba Libre in front of 50 people.

New York, March 2007: At work, I walked out of the bathroom and about the time I was right in front of the studio (meaning, everyone in the studio can see me), I started to turn the corner to talk to my friend Christian. I rolled my ankle, it slid underneath my other foot in my heels and I hit the hardwood with both knees like someone roundhouse kicked my feet out from under me. I don’t get embarrassed very easily and I might have been more embarrassed if it had been in front of people I’m not friends with, but I still looked like an idiot and turns out, landed myself in physical therapy for a month.

Waco, December 2001: Caught the heel of my shoe on the top stair in our apartment and tumbled head over feet until about halfway down and oh good, I stopped! Nope. No, I didn’t. I sailed the rest of the way to the ground and landed with all my body weight (which was a little more back then--thanks, college!) on my right hand. When I finally went to the ER the next day, the doctor came in, threw the x-ray of my wrist up on that light-up x-ray thing and said, “Oh, it’s broken.” CRAP. Then he said, “HA! It’s not broken, I’m kidding.” OH, you scared me, Doc! Followed by, “Just kidding, it really is broken.” Swear to God. That’s what he did. I wore a giant cast for months, but it got me out of talking to girls at rush parties that year. Totally worth it. BUT, it’s negatively impacted my bowling form for life as I learned a few weeks ago after work, when I bowled a 44. I also learned that night that playing games on Wii is not practice for playing them in real life. That theory is further illustrated by the fact that I’ve never played tennis in 29 years, but my Mii has mean backhand and a lightening serve.