GG 3.30.09: It would almost be scary if it wasn't wearing plaid

Well this just makes the most sense. And I like things to be organized. All the Gossip Girl posts together in one place. For eternity. Lucky you.


It would almost be scary if it wasn't wearing plaid

Tuesday, March 31, 2009 at 2:56am

They're really whoring themselves out with product placement, but Dan keeps up the amazing work and Eric's back and even more sarcastically fantastic than when he left for wherever the hell he went that was never addressed. My life makes sense again.


Nate wants Vanessa to meet him at his place in a half hour? before school? what the hell time do these kids get up? and why is Vanessa awake at all? isn't sleeping in a perk of home-schooling yourself (HA, I'm glad that sounds as ridiculous as it is)

Is Lily off to an early morning cocktail party after breakfast? It's 8am, Lil, dial it down. you're rich, we get it.

Eric! He's back from...we have no idea...who cares, he's back!

"I do my cardio in the evenings..." the 2 adults bat an eye at that comment? nope.

"Does this feel like a sitcom to anyone else?" oh, Eric, you've been missed.
"Feels more like a reality show."
"Good, so i can vote you off."
"It would almost be scary if it wasn't wearing plaid."

"oooooh, Jenny cake..." ERIC what the hell did we do without you?

Ugh, Vanessa. stone washed jeans and those stupid suede fringe boots. did she leave the mansion and hit the vintage store and American Apparel before she even got back to Brooklyn? she was doing so well.

Chuck's been watching Blair every morning? And she's been bringing Nate breakfast? That's desperate, especially for Blair.

what was with that fake snow shot of the Brooklyn bridge? we know where they live.

"why did you just lie to him? the packet's right there."
does leaving the room affect Dan's hearing? i think he can hear you, there are no walls.

wait...he'll move in with her and live off her millions, but he won't let her fork out a lousy 50 grand a year? way to be independent, Rufus.

Am I watching The Hills? these Missoni money shots are killing me.

"making up and breaking up with the same high school boy..." she's IN HIGH SCHOOL

"the kind of party that you should be throwing...adults, elegant" well that makes sense. for the sweet sixteen.

"see, she loves it!" do the humphrey kids have a hearing problem that I'm not aware of? she's right there, she can't hear that?

oh GOD, we have to look at this outfit again.

did Nate just call Vanessa "V"? hold on, i just threw up. yeah, he did, he said it.

and give me a break, she would call him out on the Blair thing right then.

HAHA...Dorota's romantic backstory. and she calls Vanessa "girl from Brooklyn"

"Pour that Dom down the drain, Dorota...wait, is that the '96?"

Chuck's robe and slippers while "they're making fools of us..." perfect.

the Humphreys have a landline? that has a cord? It's Brooklyn, not the past.

my GOD, did they get a new hair stylist? WTF is with Serena's hair? It's a hemp necklace and some patchouli away from dreads.

hahaha, the doorman is reading Ann Coulter's book.
Dan's perfect Brooklynite liberal response...laugh condescendingly. "HA Guilty: Liberal Victims and their Assault on America?"
"Dorota get me, she said it's important to know enemy."

Dan's spoken Jeffersons theme song should make me hate him, but I love him more.

I don't think Serena can tell Poppy to get her a drink.

OH LORD, Patrick McMullan appearance. so appropriate and so annoying.

Would Eric let Jenny post the party at his house on GG without even saying anything? no way. not even Jonathan would let that happen.

"What are they doing here? What do we do?" They're like 2 feet away, why can't they hear them??! WHY CAN NO ONE HEAR ANYTHING?

"there are strangers having sex in your bed"

hahahaha...Dan's pretentious lit talk to pick up girls. You're not at Yale yet, Humphrey. good practice, though.
"the word used was uh...haunting...i love that...ah..."

wow Vanessa's goin all out. jealousy makes teenagers so bitchy.

"only my boyfriend gets to touch my hair" that was too cheesy, even for me.

AAAH Serena's hair is even worse. was SHE the one having sex in her bed?

"well, we ARE in high school" THANK YOU, Dan.

ew, Dan WOULD say "making love." sick.

"because she wanted CLUE and a CROCKPOT"
"mom...you could at least make an attempt to mask your distaste." Eric should never go away again. ever.

"when it was just me and eric, it was a pretty safe bet it was my fault.."
"thaaat's true..."

"it sounds to me what Serena put together was...delightful..."
hahaha, she's so amazingly pretentious. and yet, she's in love with Rufus. It's heartwarming.

HA, Dan's Strand t-shirt. so true.

"we're not needy enough??"
I live in a giant loft in Brooklyn and go to a private school on the Upper East side...and THAT's not needy enough?? He's so down to earth.

"the ducks do soothe me..."

aw, dorota's so happy for her

whoa, Nate's hair, too. how long has he been standing out in the snow? and WHERE is the hair stylist??

AAAAAAH...Savannah. And AGAIN, how did Poppy not hear that, she was right there

hahaha...nice job with Scott's parents' house in the suburbs, i thought i had accidentally changed channels to According to Jim.

Verizon Hub product placement. sneaky.
also, I'm pretty sure that the picture that comes up with Serena's text is my buddy icon.

If Ed Westwick and Jessica Szohr awkwardly make out like this in real life, maybe he IS gay.